Today you stood on a thistle. You yelped, crawled over to me and clung on to me for dare life. Your little hands grasped onto my cheeks trying to get closer and closer to me. It wasn’t possible but you continued to try. Your face touched mine and I could feel the tears running down between our cheeks. They fell from your long wet lashes which were kissing my nose. I told you it was ok and there we sat for a long while, waiting for the stress to leave your little body.
Read MoreIt’s amazing to think back
To a time when I had space
It’s a distance memory now, it’s true
A chapter now replaced.
This is how I want you to grow up.
In a happy home, a loving home, a safe home.
Smiling when you’re happy, crying when you’re sad and yelling when you’re mad.
I want you to be able to feel emotion, understand emotion and express emotion.
Read MoreIt doesn’t matter if you work full time or are a stay at home mum.
It doesn’t matter if your child is in day care or at home with you.
It doesn’t matter if your child goes to swimming lessons or learns in a paddling pool at home.
Read MoreIt happens each time that we are due to go out. Mark’s shirts are ironed, Lottie’s dressed and fed, the car is packed. I am excited to be going out as a family for the first time in a long time. I ask Mark to look after Lottie while I get myself ready in the last 5 minutes spare. It’s amazing how efficient you become.
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As you sit in a messy room late at night You are tired and can’t be bothered
You think about all you’ve done that day There is still a lot to be conquered.
You have played with play dough
You have taught your child how to bake You have done some cleaning
But there is still much to do and it’s late.
Read MoreDad was at work. It was just me and you.
Things were going well initially. You watched and played as I exercised, we filled up the pool and you ate snacks, lot of snacks. I cleaned a bit but I couldn’t really be bothered. You played outside again for a while as I hung out some washing. The sun was out and the birds were chirping. You were smiling from ear to ear as you picked blades of grass and watched them blow away in the wind.
Read MoreIt’s a messy house we now live in
I can hardly see the floor
Between the unfolded clothes and layers of toys
She’s a clean freak’s nightmare, that’s for sure.
It’s not always like this
There are times when I clean
When my child is sleeping
And I’m overly keen.
Read MoreIt’s like nothing I have ever experienced We have a special connection you and I It’s beautiful and indescribable
But you make me want to try.
When you cry I want to make it stop
To wipe your tears and make you feel ok It’s only you that makes me feel like this No one else, not in this way.
Read MoreHow am I thirty?
I’m thirty. Thirty? Thirty?! THIRTY!
I achieved this milestone on 10 November 2019. Where on earth did a third of my life go?
Mark asked me what I wanted for my birthday. Here were my thoughts on the matter:
Read MoreFriends. We all need them. They are there to laugh at you, with you and for you. They offer a shoulder to cry on, a lap to spew on and a bed to sleep in.
In your younger days you are given platforms to meet friends. Toys, sandpits and playgrounds help form your relationships initially. Through intermediate to secondary school, you have things like school camps and boarding school. Through University you have flat warming parties, garden parties, and any other adjective with the word “party” at the end.
Read MoreYou used to be so tiny,
So delicate,
So small.
You used to need me to nourish you,
So dependent,
So beautiful.
Read MoreThey say that becoming a parent is one of, if not the, best chapter of your life. I agree. It is one big messy love story with each chapter getting better and better.
Read MoreYou are the reason I get up each morning.
Even though my eye lids are as heavy as a five tonne truck.
Even though all I want is a sleep in, a coffee and breakfast in bed.
You are more important.
Read MoreMy motto in life has always been to finish what I start. This has always applied to all aspects of my life: My work, my workouts, my cooking, my cleaning and social commitments.
Read More"I, Emma, take thee, body, to be my wedded better half, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."
Your relationship with your own body is like an arranged marriage. You don’t get to choose who you are paired with but you are expected to do your best to make the relationship work come hell or high water.
Read MoreIt is with a seriously foggy thought process courtesy of far too many sleepless nights that I write this post. Sorry in advance for what may be a disorganised mess featuring many brain fades but it is important to me that I keep this blog as real as possible and man is the current chapter of teething terror a very real reality for our family of three.
Read MoreI have always loved the way you make me feel, the warmth you give me when we touch, the comfort you give me when I’m cold, and your forgiving nature when I’m feeling unattractive.
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We live in an age of social norms, comparisons and filters. It is hard to decipher what is real from what is not. It is easy to think someone is living their best life when all you have to go off is their snippets of the highlight reels showcased with pretty filters and cheesy captions. It’s easy to forget that those snippets probably make up 5% (if that) of their every day life. This leaves many feeling unjustifiably inadequate.
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