Go figure

I used to think you could figure it all out eventually. After all, isn’t that the goal? The expectation? The pressure?⠀
I thought it was going to be like following a manual of sorts, and that through trial and error you get there in the end. ⠀
What’s the best way to do that? What should I not to do next time? How could I be more efficient with that?⠀
Routine,⠀
Balance,⠀
Tidy home,⠀
Self care,⠀
Romance,⠀
Insert further expectations here.⠀
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I’ve learnt that while you may figure out some aspects of motherhood some days, you will probably never figure it out completely every day. ⠀
Motherhood is unpredictable. There is no manual. There is trial and error, lots of that, but you don’t always get to the destination. And that’s ok!⠀
While the days can feel the same, each is always different. There are varying moods and stages, new milestones and lasts, big emotions and unreadable ones, and that’s just what they bring.⠀
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Each day you contribute varying levels of patience, motivation and stress, to name a few. ⠀
Some days the variables work well together and you feel like you’ve figured it all out but that doesn’t always carry into tomorrow or next week and almost never into next year. ⠀
There are many variables, stages and emotions. ⠀
We are humans, not robots. We both change all the time and have different needs ALL THE TIME. ⠀
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So maybe motherhood wasn’t meant to be something that is all figured out as many lead us to believe?⠀
Maybe it’s about figuring out what we can each day, and then starting fresh the next?⠀
Maybe it’s about tuning out of outside noise and into the inside more?⠀
Maybe it’s about focusing on the equation rather than the answer?⠀
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If so, maybe then we’ll realise we have what we need for motherhood already figured out. ⠀
We know how to love them, that’s figured out the moment we lay eyes on them.⠀
We know what they need, that’s figured out when we stop worrying about the outside noise and trust our gut. ⠀
We know we are doing our best, that’s figured out as soon as we quieten our inner self critic.⠀
Maybe that’s it. ⠀
Motherhood cannot be all figured out, but we can figure out that we already have what we need for motherhood. ⠀
Maybe.