Time for each other

I’m trying my best.

I hope they can see that.

When my eyes do not meet theirs when they need them to, it’s not because I don’t want them to.

And its not because I’m not trying to see them in their moment of trying.

It’s because I’m needed by others too.

When I’m feeding my baby, I’m making sure my toddlers are not hurting themselves.

When I’m playing with my toddlers, I’m listening out for my baby crying.

When I’m cooking dinner with my baby in the front pack and trying to show my toddler how to wash the potatoes, I’m asking the other to not tip my pot plant onto the carpet.

This is mothering more than one.

It’s having your attention everywhere else other than where you feel you need to be at any given time.

It’s starting each day with a plan to make it easier and ending each day feeling guilt about what you couldn’t make happen.

It’s feeling exhausted by not only the physical aspect of mothering this way, but also the mental requirement to be on in every which way possible.

The mother in me wants to meet all needs at once, but it’s not possible.

And thankfully, the human in me knows that.

It knows that all needs will be met every day eventually, with the gaps requiring patience being filled with so much love.

And that’s enough.

That’s more than enough.

That’s what will one day will turn into an abundance of everything we all need,

Time for each other.