My unsolicited opinion

Today I was taken back to my former life as a family lawyer. I wasn’t wearing a suit, holding a dictaphone, time recording, or giving advice to a client. However, I gave the same advice I would have back then, nonetheless.

To hear of a child being hurt or neglected at the hands of one of or both of their parents still makes my blood boil. These common scenarios still remain fresh in my mind. To hear that no agency such a Oranga Tamariki or the police were notified of the information still makes me sad beyond belief. This common reaction still remains as frustrating as it used to be.

As I received the heartbreaking details today, I offered my unsolicited opinion on the matter of non-notification. Namely, that he must notify the authorities without further delay. I assured him that it could be anonymous, it could be after the event and it may come to nothing. However, that his notification may be the one that the authorities need to take action, or be the start of an evidential paper trail to bring safety to this child’s life.

My advice was well received but I cannot be sure that the notification will be made. We can lead a horse to water but we can’t make them drink. As we parted ways, my mind was turned to this problem in the face of the current expectation for self-isolation.

For many of us, self isolation can be a time for family, good books, and catching up on maintenance around the house. It can be a time for reflection, conversation and love. But sadly this is not the case for all.

For some families, close proximity for long periods in stressful circumstances can present safety risks within the family unit. It can mean a time of increased violence, neglect, and substance abuse.

For some children, school is their safe place.
For some children, spending weekends with their grandparents is what keeps them away from heightened exposure to drug and alcohol abuse.
For some children, having one of their parents working night shifts can be the difference between not witnessing violence every night and witnessing it every night.
To take these safety nets away, these vulnerable children are at more risk that ever.

Although it is no longer my job, I feel it is still my duty to worry for these children in these circumstances and speak up whenever I can as their advocate.

As self isolation ramps up, so too will the children in unsafe situations. When we have knowledge of a child at risk, we need to take it upon ourselves to notify the appropriate authorities. If we don’t, we too have blood on our hands.