Seeing the wins

Start, stop, forget what you started. ⠀⠀
Start over, stop, forget what you started over. ⠀⠀
Don’t start, stop, forget what you didn’t start.⠀⠀

Working from home while looking after young children.⠀⠀
It’s one way not to finish anything you start and re-start everything you haven’t already finished.⠀⠀
You can feel like you are constantly chasing your tail. You go round and round in circles trying to get what you need to get done in a day but as is the case with any circle, there is no start nor end. ⠀⠀

Nap time is your saviour, if you are lucky enough to still have that, but that is only a small window of the day, and that window gets smaller and smaller as they grow bigger and bigger.⠀⠀
Regular naps.⠀⠀
2 naps.⠀⠀
1 nap.⠀⠀
Half a nap.⠀⠀
No nap.⠀⠀

Night time is often your only choice, if you are lucky enough to be able to keep your eyes open, but that is not sustainable every night, particularly if you are still on night shift. ⠀⠀
Try and stay awake.⠀⠀
Try and sleep. ⠀⠀
Sleep.⠀⠀
Awoken.⠀⠀
Try and stay awake.⠀⠀
Try and get back to sleep.⠀⠀

Sometimes you have no choice but to fill the gaps in between sleep, but that demands the most from you, physically and mentally. Your hands are already holding too much and your mind is full with guilt.⠀⠀
You shouldn’t be working while they are there.⠀⠀
They need you more.⠀⠀
They have had too much screen time.⠀⠀
Other mums make it work. ⠀⠀
(Insert further unhelpful guilt driven thoughts here).⠀⠀⠀

Sometimes you feel like you can’t win, it’s natural.⠀⠀
However more often than not you are winning because as a mum winning looks like getting something done rather than everything done.⠀⠀
It looks like celebrating the small victories, rather than celebrating only the big ones. ⠀
It looks like doing your best, not being the best. ⠀⠀⠀
The start, stops, the interruptions are all part of working from home but they are not all of it. There are the wins in between, even if they are hard to recognise.⠀⠀

Motherhood.⠀⠀
It’s just about seeing the “wins”, rather than being blinded by the “losses”. ⠀⠀
That’s how I see it anyway.