Quiet backseats

I sit there in the quiet

For the first time all day

In the middle of anywhere

Time passing my way.

⠀

It can be in a car park

Or outside my home

It doesn’t need to be flash

Just a safe, quiet zone.

⠀

I hear them behind me

As they breathe out their sleep

The engine still running

So their dreams run deep.

⠀

I feel my shoulders relax

And the calm wash over me

As I feel my own pulse

And the wheel on my knee.

⠀

There is no one grizzling

Or needing something done

It’s just me and myself

Breaking from being mum.

⠀

So I open up my phone

And do nothing but scroll

Getting lost in everything else

Deep down a rabbit hole.

⠀

And when I hear a stir

I’m stopped in my tracks

I look in the rear view mirror

Feeling anything but relaxed.

⠀

“Please stay asleep” I think

“I need a little longer

To catch up with myself

To get a little stronger”.

⠀

And when they do relax

And settle back to sleep

I carry on doing nothing

While hearing not a peep.

⠀

It’s not an ideal setting

For self care to take place

But it’s all I manage some days

When time moves at pace.

⠀

So here’s to the mothers

Parked up, engines on

Enjoying the quiet backseats

May today it last long.