Toddler hold ups

Getting out of the house with a toddler...

Puts alarm on the night before.

Wakes earlier to another alarm (not the electronic version).

Gets up.

Puts dressing gown on.

Doesn’t look in mirror.

Gets toddler up.

Cuddles.

Consoles.

Cuddles.

Changes toddler’s nappy.

Makes toddler’s breakfast.

Makes own coffee.

Feeds toddler breakfast.

Forgets about own coffee.

Reheats.

Tends to tantrum.

Gives toddler the toy she threw on top of the table during tantrum which is now out of reach to avoid further tantrum.

Does NOT work.

Picks toddler up.

Cuddles.

Consoles.

Cuddles.

Tummy rumbles.

Remembers to eat.

Puts toast in toaster.

Hears cat screech.

Removes toddler from cat.

Looks at time.

Panic.

Late!

Gets toddler changed.

Prepares snacks.

Prepares baby bag.

Brushes teeth.

Looks in mirror.

Remembers...

Hasn’t got changed.

Hasn’t done hair.

Hasn’t had breakfast.

Hasn’t had coffee.

Gets changed.

Interrupted.

Picks up toilet rolls scattered around feet below.

Looks at time.

Very late!

Forgets hair.

Forgets toast.

Forgets coffee.

Packs car.

*Insert first buckle sound here.

Gives toddler snacks.

Gives toddler toys.

Quietness.

**Insert second buckle sound here.

Still quietness.

Relieved.

Takes first breath.

Grizzles start.

Turns radio on.

Sees time.

Remembers...

Still late.

Still hungry.

Still tired.

Still only 7.45am.