That time again

We sat in the quiet room waiting for something you didn’t know we were waiting for.⠀
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You were smiling and wriggling, trying to escape from my tight locked arms around you. You were so blissfully unaware of what was about to come. ⠀
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I continued to look at my watch and hoped for the time to pass quickly. I was well aware of what was to come. We have done this a few times now. ⠀
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I kissed your forehead and reassured you things would be ok, even though it was me who needed the reassurance. ⠀
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As I heard your name being called by the lady wearing a welcoming smile and blue uniform, my palms became sweaty and my heart rate increased. ⠀
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We followed her down the long hallway to her space. Seeing the room full of plastic tubes, colourful animal posters and cords was exciting for you. I couldn’t wait to be escorted out and have the door closed behind us.⠀
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The space quickly become crowded as more cheerful women wearing blue surrounded us. You started to feel overwhelmed and clung to me like a little cub. ⠀
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I listened to the instructions and abided, even though I felt cruel by aiding them through what you were about to be put through. ⠀
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Your two little legs were clamped between mine and your arms restrained unnaturally. There you sat on me wondering what this unusual setting was about to bring. ⠀
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And then it happened. ⠀
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The two unforgiving needles entered your little body, and then two more. ⠀
Your eyes looked at me for help. You questioned why I was letting you go through a pain you have not gone through before. ⠀
Normally I am your safe place. ⠀
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Your shrieks were loud and heartbreaking. They still echo loudly in each of my ears.⠀
Even though I was doing what I think is best for you, the pain seemed to be shared. ⠀
In the presence of the ladies in blue and the animal posters on the wall, my little baby you cried, and I cried like a baby. ⠀
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15 month immunisations. No fun.